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The Allusion Winter Guard has 2 t-shirts that we sell at shows. These shirts have a list of color guard excuses on the back. Both lists of excuses are different. On the front of the first shirt is says, Color Guard - No Excuses. The front of the second shirt says, Color Guard - No More Excuses.



 What's Your Excuse ???

The Allusion Winter Guard would like to create a third and final excuse t-shirt for the upcoming 2004 season.


You can help by sending us your favorite excuse.
All excuses will be posted on this page.
During the off season our staff will choose the excuses that will make up our new shirt.
Here are some excuses that that have been sent to us

I'm right and everyone around me is wrong
My rifle got stuck in the basketball hoop.
They ARE out to get me!
If I live to see tonight I'll figure out how to do it.
Sarah AKA Hobbit Portage Central High School Portage Michigan

That's not how I was told to do it
I didn't know it would break if I dropped it
It must be the tape
I never asked to be captain
A freshmen can't do THAT
Hey, we never said we were GOOD
Joey, Broadneck High School Colorguard

I did it right it was everyone else who was wrong
Thats what I just did
Looks better this way
Sarah-Stebbins High School- Ohio

The tempos not right
She didn't march right and got me off.
The wind was blowing to hard
I can't find my equipment
Torey~~~Unioto High School

It's the wind
Alyssa, Rio Mesa HS

Are you sure I'm doing it wrong
This is the way I was taught
I don't have any hand and eye coordination
My arms are about to fall off
My eye hurts
I'm thirsty
You changed the routine
Jasslyn-Rich East Color Guard

We've been practicing for 5 hours and we've only had one break.
-Brittany - East Davidson High School Colorguard

Oh, you meant that left.
I thought we needed some improv at that measure.
But my flag's bigger than me
My flag doesn't deserve being that high.
Mistake?  What mistake?
I don't know why my feet were off beat
A fortune cookie said that I shouldn't
~Julie from Eastern Alamance High

It was her fault
I cant spin with this skirt on
That's not what she taught us
I am in my spot! your wrong!
Roll your flag
I couldnt find a flag.
My mom drove me! It's not my fault i'm late!
I hurt my ankle.
Jesi - Decatur Central High School

Well of course i screwed up this isn't my flag someone stole it!
I can't help that I'm the only one who knows how to do it right
I can't perform in front of hot guys
That was 10 push-ups I swear!
You just put me in the back cause I'm ugly
I can't hear you.. this gym echos
I'm just saving my energy for the show
Krystle - oakdale high color guard

My flag has a tear in it
The poles to big
My Sabres Bent
My stopper came off
Theres no tape on this flag
Jurupa valley

Scooch over, your too close.
Thats my spot
I cant toss that straight
It was a 45 not flat
Samantha from Ramona high school

She isn't going fast enough.
She is to far back.
I am in my spot, she is wrong
The rifle is messed up
The black top is WAY to hot.
I'm not CRYING!!!!!!
My hair is falling down and the Glitter is getting in my eyes.
Montana Burkhart, Graves County High School.

I'm naturally like that.
I have a naturally sikled foot.
I think I broke something.
I had a family thing.
But that's my boyfriends day with me.
God wouldn't like me to give up church.
Sophi-Edinburg North H.S.,TX

Well I did so many plies yesterday I can't walk.
It's cold, it's raining, I'm numb and I wanna sleep
Sorry brain fart.
My shoe came untied.
My flag has PMS.
They're all off count and I'm right.
I was watching her!
I don't move that way!
Uhhhh can u do that one more time?
I am streching!
Well I didn't have any time to sleep I was here practicing with you
Mikki, Westminster high school

The sun's in my eyes
But I'm just a BABY
You wrote it. You should know it.
I swallowed an ice-cube. I might die soon
The runners folded it wrong.
~Sarah~ Unknown Guard

But I cross her on my way to my spot
I don't know this work
She has my rifle
My bun won't stay straight
Akins High School
Austin, TX

I'm the captain
I did it soooo good, you didn't even see it
Lyndzi "Z" -Portage Central High School

I have a hole in my butt.
You want me to bend over in that?
There's a 6:30 in the morning? On Saturday?
That's not what I learned last year
Veronica - USC Silks

My silk got caught on the velvet
Jessica - Buena High School

Ouch! I hit my head
Terra - Buena High School

My butts in the way
Stephanie - Buena High School

Its Joshs fault
Everyone - Buena High School

I thought that was the front
Erica - Castle Park High School

Something got in my eye
Erica - Castle Park High School

My finger got caught
Lindsey - Poway High School

Im too short
Rosemary - Upland High School

Its her fault
Upland High School

Its spreading! Its Spreading!
Marina - Upland High School

My hair fell out
Townsend Jr. High School

I didnt sleep enough
Rosie - Arroy Valley High School

I know
Rosie - Arroy Valley High School

The coach was late
Veronica - YLMS

I forgot the radio
Veronica - YLMS

The devil made me drop it
Christina Spinks - Ramona High School

You want me to do what?
Adrienne - Ramona High School

My mom forgot to pack it.
My ponytail is too tight.
My knee hurts, and I forgot my brace.
My shoes are tied too tight.
The weights in the pole are not right.
I can do it with my sabre at home, must be this sabre.
She was in my way, I couldnt get to my equipment in time.
Kristen - Baldwinsville Senior Guard - New York

Nobody ever showed me how
I had a cramp
My blister popped
My way is better
Christine - Instructor - Newbury Park High School

Its too early!
Its off-weight.
Its the flags fault!
I hurt my foot.
Start cracking up laughing and say, Im not sane!
Im dehydrated
Are you SURE that's how you do it?
I meant to do that... really!
Christine- Portage Central High School- Michigan

My flag is warped
My cousin taught me different
Jessica - Morristown High School

What's my motivation
You meant 5 AM?
I got a sail
The rifle bit me
My flags afraid of hieghts
I've only got two hands
How Many?
Isnt today a holiday somewhere in the world?
Its the spandex
How are we supposed to do that?
A bee stung me - A bee stung me again
But i'm only an alternate
But we were supposed to go home 20 min. ago
You said 5 min., it's only been 2
The compititions where?
But i already dyed it blue
But i just pierced it yesterday
But it's my birthday
Go where in 4 counts?
I burnt my hair on the curling iron
It makes me look fat
It makes me look too thin
Can you show us again
I'm dizzy
How am i supposed to spot when she keeps moving?
But it's raining
But I couldnt go home before practice
But I came straight from work
My boyfriend wont like that
This song is boring
This isnt fair!
Patricia- formily of Granada Hills High School California

Because Im pigeon toed.
Just because it didnt look right to you, it WAS right to me.
I did it right this time I swear.
You were staring at me.
I cant walk and do THAT!
Jennifer - Lamphere Winter Guard - Michigan

Oh, just kidding!
Its the band's fault!
You want me to do WHAT?
His rifle is lighter than mine.
My pole is bent.
My hair hurts.
But I have ants in my pants!
Do I look like I'm in alliance ?
He made me do it !
Isnt that the way to do it ?
Wait... I'm confused...
Chris - Southwest Miami HS Colorguard/Winterguard - Miami, Florida

Its too hot
Its too cold
The band is distracting
I cant find it, i saw a drummer with it last
I dont own a toaster
My toaster is unplugged
**(toaster- plane in which you are supposed to keep your flag in)
I left it in my car
Aim for the saxes
Aim for the drummers
Its got a mind of its own
Its gravitys fault
I couldnt see it because of all the glitter
I have to work
But thats how you do it
I was just doing what you said, a DROP spin
Kasey- River Ridge Royal Color Guard, Florida

Im the cutest one here anyway
Theyll all stare at my butt anyway
It looks better faster...watch
I was thinking too much
I wasnt thinking
I can toss a 6 and he cant
I suck at that because I hate it
Im always right, so change it
insert good guard here) wants me
My mom didnt notice
They were all watching me, I got nervous
Mike - West Milford HS Winterguard, NJ

I cant do it when you watch me!
My hand got stuck in the silk.
But that is how I did it!
Thats what we were supposed to do?
I feel like Im gonna faint.
But that's how you taught us the first time.
NO, this is how its done!
I was gone all day and night and couldnt practice.
But you didnt tell us to practice THAT.
I dont remember you teaching us that!
Michelle - Royal High School Color Guard - Simi Valley, California

You wrote this not me
I wanna see you do it
What, you think im perfect.....hardly
Erinn-South Carroll High School

But the wind took it
The flag tip got stuck in my pants
You said it was an angle
I was sleeping, what?
Laura - Middletown Area High School - Middletown Pennsylvania

I was just showing everyone what NOT to do at a show.
Just making sure everyone was paying attention.
Everyone else is wrong.. I'm right.
Emily - Baker High School Color guard

I havent GOT any rythm!
My face itches.
Theres a bug on me.
Its to hot to run.
But jazz running makes me look like a deer!
I cant jazz run that slow!
I cant jazz run that fast!
Ive never been able to jazz run.
I had to fix my hair.
Oh, you start on your left foot? Aaaaah...
I dont know HOW to do eye-liner.
But I NEVER wear make-up!
That much lipstick looks stupid on me.
I AM wearing enough make-up!
Someone took my flag!
I was watching her and SHE was wrong!
But the captains werent smiling...
I only faked the toss that one time...
My leg hurts.
Nobody ELSE is doing it that way...
If i put my head up, I cant see what Im doing/where Im going.
We learned that 3 WEEKS ago!
I cant practice at home because my flag doesnt fit in my car.
These hand flags are different from mine.
They didnt teach us that at tryouts.
Qiana Jeffress - former Heritage High School Colorguard member

But my gloves dont fit!!
I cant catch it like that!!
This isnt the cavaliers!
Its not my fault!
My balad flag got stuck on my tunic!
These pants make my legs all itchy!
I'm PMSing.
If you want to pay for my dental bill, Ill catch it like that!
Shes speaking another language.
I inhaled line marker, so i couldnt catch that toss
She hit me!!
She cant do that work right, shes screwing me up!!
She took my flag.
I'm sorry i was distracted by the other band.
I didnt catch the toss because I was too busy flirting with the Cymball line!
I am wearing enough glitter!
I have too much hairspray in! I cant get my hand though my hair!
I didnt eat dinner.
This flag is weighted funny.
I cant get there in 4 counts.
I can do eyeliner - just not on a bus going 60 MPH!
My flag is mad at me.
Alison - Broadneck High Color Guard

Got An Excuse ???

E-Mail them to the Allusion Winter Guard
Please include your name and the name of your school or guard